February 22, 2008
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I may get myself “in trouble” for this post, but it’s been on my mind previously, and it jumped into the melon this morning as I was scraping the frost off the bug.
Okay. So, I don’t have children. I’ve chosen that for myself. I’ve purposely done things to prevent it, like many women. Now, should I get discriminated against because I don’t have kids? No, I shouldn’t. But it’s happened. And it’s happened to others close to me. Example from a friend: She has an oddball schedule because her co-workers have children. They want to come in after dropping off the kiddies at school or wherever, so she gets the early start time of 7 bells. They don’t. Sure, she gets to leave early, BUT this wasn’t her choice. She was given that schedule based on the fact that she doesn’t have children, and they do (or so I understand – she seriously is the only one without kids at her place of work). Same thing happened to me when I was a T.A. (didn’t assist anyone, by the way – that title needs to change). A lecturer had children to drop off in the morning, so she couldn’t teach her 8am class. I got asked to take it; she took my 9:30am course. Oh, yea, that was the same semester that I was asked to teach a night class – people with kids don’t want those classes either (in defense of my favorite colleagues at NDSU, though, they taught many graduate-level night classes to accomodate those with full-time jobs AND kids).
And for the other end of it all, I now have more and more students who are parents. Which is great; however, we have an attendance policy that states something along the lines of “if you are absent, it’ll be excused under these specified circumstances and proof…” Circumstances like being sick (with a doctor’s note), military, school-related job fairs and travel for athletes, funerals (again, with proof) allow students to make up work. Now, if a student calls me or the Dean’s office with the excuse that his/her child is sick, is that excused? Not according to the policy. And, really, I’ve had students with five uncles pass away (pre-attendance policy) or who’ve claimed to be sick for a whole week (hmm – the very week a paper was due too!), so let’s just say I am skeptical. Automatically. Maybe I just get pissy because I don’t have that excuse to use?
I guess it all boils down to this: I am rarely sick… so I’m on campus, in class, teaching much more than someone with a crappy immune system or family. Based on this, I figure there should be some compensation for never calling in sick.
Perhaps it’s a good thing I believe in karma. This is the first time I’ve complained about this, so maybe the fact that I just do what I am supposed to do will reward me in the end?
Comments (7)
Sometimes you need to give something a good ‘shove’ before your view can be seen. If you feel it’s something address, tell everyone in your class. On a different note; say I happen to not to be awake for your class. I;m always am and love your class and I know teachers are different, but I still want to hear an opinion; do you think it’s worse to over sleep in one’s dorm or to fall asleep in class. I got Milan’s last semester, he liked the fact that I did try to get to class anyways; but I wasn’t having trouble with his class, as in a certain teacher I’m having with this semester. I hate being a night person… I’m tired all mourning through, and I wish I had you class first, as it always exciting and I know I wouldn’t sleep through it.
Wanna know what else falls into the category of “extra leeway given to college kids who are parents?” FINANCIAL AID! I understand that it must be hard to go to school and have a family, and then try to pay for both, but honestly!!! One girl from my class said that she received $4000.00 extra dollars in financial aid just because she had a family, and that she was going to use some of that money to buy an XBox or Wii or whatever they hell is popular right now for her kids for Christmas. Her kids are 3 years old and 7 months old. WTF… grrrrr (There’s my rant for today…:P)
@qzri -
Yeah, and then you have people like me who had to fight for the $500 I did manage to get.
Then you have little old me…
Waiting like a vulture until the price dies!
Muhahahahaha…
Honestly, so what if they have a family, we were told 4 responsibilities; I forgot most of them, except the challenge of graduating in ’09! *sighs* I don’t think make everyone bend to your knee is one of those responsibilities…
If anything, is should be the kids from bigger families that should get a little extra, as they are still 4 other that the parents have to take care of… Okay 5; that’s because I can’t find a really cheap and good place…
I don’t have kids either, and I’m not sure I want them at this point. But I do believe that a general lack of flexibility in the corporate world is an obstacle for many women, who struggle to balance careers and children. To me, basic feminism requires that women be able to manage both… and so when there are places that give women such flexibility, I applaud that in general. It doesn’t benefit you (or me!), but I guess I think it’s part of the greater good.
I feel the same way about it that I do about affirmative action, I suppose: annoyed that I can sometimes be disadvantaged by it. Irritated because it feels unfair. But also aware that it’s a necessary step on the road to true equality…
I suppose I should look at it this way = It’s nice that that flexibility is there IF I ever do have a family… ?
And, for now, I usually only grant leeway to those students who are really REALLY trying in class. Who go above and beyond the “call of duty.” Who are there everyday. Everyday. And do every single piece of extra credit I throw out.
I had a student once who claimed he was “sick” over the phone. I, being the meanie, told him that he had to have “proof” in order to hand in the paper late. He showed up to my office 1/2 hour later, with the reddest nose I’ve ever seen. BUT he handed it in; he was an A student and followed the rules set in place for fairness & my sanity. It would drive me nuts, as a student, seeing others hand in stuff whenever they wanted after I had worked my butt off at 4 a.m. to get the thing in on time.
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